tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-77569423720424543532012-01-11T11:47:33.399-08:00dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.comBlogger401100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-23524676276969691052010-11-02T12:08:00.000-07:002010-11-02T12:09:19.891-07:00

You might remember my post about Gideon Gono, the Chief Central Reserve Banker for Zimbabwe who gleefully printed trillions of dollars and ran his country's economy into the clay-streaked dirt. Now the Sunday Times of South Africa accuses him of sleeping with Mugabe's wife. To which I say: oh snap. In relative political terms, this would be like Ben Bernanke gettin' stinky with Michelle Obama.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-82702926973030851602010-09-17T13:14:00.001-07:002010-09-17T13:14:55.656-07:00

I'll have a new blog soon. Until then, read this 1700-word article about sludge metal and Freemasons.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-70588615637551081962010-09-02T14:10:00.000-07:002010-10-21T22:01:26.546-07:00

I submit my first genuine contribution to the field of paid, published journalism today: A 350-word article about a dude gettin' knifed on the subway, SPECIAL to the Brooklyn Daily Eagle. It's not precisely the Watergate affair, but you gotta start somewhere. I'm coming out of the tunnels, and I can literally only go up

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-53574851718072589942010-04-28T02:09:00.000-07:002010-04-28T02:18:12.154-07:00

OK so I owe my readership an apology for not posting in over a month. In particular I would like to extend my condolences to those of my readers who have yet to discover the magic of RSS and think the only way to read a blog is to navigate to the page in Internet Explorer and furiously press F5 until the content is updated. I find it hard to believe that people like you still exist in the modern

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-47610175900878790332010-03-22T06:26:00.000-07:002010-03-22T06:55:17.990-07:00

Click on the above photo for the big version. As you know, the entire continent of Africa is a charity case. Well that's the story at least, as dictated from on high by the ever-expanding galaxy of celebrities who lead the appeal.  Bill Gates, Bono and Angelina Jolie are the brightest stars of the movement, and it's worth thinking about precisely what that means. It means that the world's

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-3988317252193461612010-03-10T07:43:00.000-08:002010-03-11T23:10:32.024-08:00

UPDATE: There are a number audio files embedded in this post. You need Flash installed and turned on to see 'em. Afro 70 Band - Kwa Vile Nakupenda This song was my introduction to muziki wa dansi. I heard it for the first time nearly 30 years after it was first popular, on a fourth-generation cassette tape that I bought at a swap meet in Rungwe, (an experience described briefly here). The

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-87433595342760597572010-02-28T11:55:00.000-08:002010-02-28T12:22:40.719-08:00

Sitting in a cafe in Zanzibar. This place is widely billed as an exotic destination, which means it's full of pushy touts and dreadlocked European backpackers. I'm bad at tourism, in a general sense; I don't like looking at monuments, I don't like being lectured by tour guides, I don't take pictures, and I definitely am not interested in hearing what a great time Fran and Lippi had at the full

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-11473559214085444612010-02-10T02:09:00.000-08:002010-02-15T23:51:56.729-08:00

As always, click on the image to see the large version. Go on, click it. It took me 2,500 hours in MacPaint to create this image, you can spend 15 seconds looking at it.1. Lothar von TrothaGovernor, German South-West Africa, 1904-1905 (Present-day Namibia)Teutonic sadist who made it his life's ambition to exterminate the Hottentot and the Herero. Authorized killings of men, women and children,

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-82044458587098675592010-02-05T06:25:00.000-08:002010-02-05T07:04:08.255-08:00

The continuation. Read part 1 here. fashionI hesitate to even write the word. yeah ok, there's some maasai floating around, with their colored wraps and their boss white sandals and their braids and their nickel-sized ear piercings. they used to herd animals, but here in the city they're reduced to directing cars at mzungu-oriented hotels and restaurants, which I find singularly distressing (

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-79168509971874243222010-02-02T07:31:00.000-08:002010-02-03T00:43:33.694-08:00

Dar Es Salaam is the largest city in Tanzania, where I've been living for the last three months. Don't let the following fool you; it's a totally OK place.geographythe best view is from the plane, which shows downtown in miniature framed by an impenetrable maze of slums. it was a hobby of mine as a kid, drawing mazes, and here it's replicated writ-large, a labyrinth of tesselated tin roof shacks,

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-2949801365579740822010-01-29T01:12:00.000-08:002010-01-29T01:51:00.425-08:00

OK, in the interests of being a more punctual correspondent, I've started a twitter feed associated with this blog. I've thrown up three or four proto-tweets, added a li'l widget to the left there, and you can follow me directly here. Also make sure to watch and retweet the Rabadaba video, at least up to the part where he sings like a girl (pic related.)(n.b. My previous twitter feed, which

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-69201092746189528892010-01-27T00:20:00.000-08:002010-01-27T01:38:41.145-08:00

It's been a while since I wrote about food, and I figured my readership was hungry for it (you see what I did there?)It's not clear to me why some countries have good food and others don't. At first I linked it to poverty, but that makes no sense, since Ethiopia and Mexico are as poor as gravel farmers, and they are still cooking up some marvelous shit. To say nothing of American soul food.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-844850124061553252010-01-12T07:55:00.000-08:002010-01-12T22:15:15.182-08:00

I should warn my readership right away that my attitude towards the gay rights movement is maybe not as enlightened as would be strictly dictated by an unfettered liberal conscience. I'm a fucking neanderthal, to put it bluntly, and my embrace of the gay rights movement is similar to my embrace of an actual live gay dude: a hug, at first, which morphs into a bro-hug with back-thumping, upon which

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-46631310985097415092009-12-25T04:21:00.000-08:002009-12-25T04:24:37.705-08:00

Blogging will resume in the new year. Until then have a Merry Christmas!

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-27176241816918053232009-12-23T07:43:00.000-08:002009-12-23T08:02:30.056-08:00

Uncle Ben runs a fishing cooperative on the shores of Lake Victoria. His real name is Benedict, but he insists that I call him this, "Uncle Ben", even though for me it has uncomfortable racial connotations of which he is of course unaware. He's old, maybe 70, and his eyes have turned a pale limpid blue. At first I attributed this to cataracts, but it's such a widespread phenomenon in this part of

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-41203371174831822052009-12-16T04:29:00.000-08:002009-12-16T04:47:37.764-08:00

I spent the weekend writing 2,500 words to apply to j-school, so give me a second before I can post some more original content. In the meantime gaze in awe at The Big Picture's 2009 in photos, which includes the following gem from a recent Mozambican soccer riot.REUTERS/Grant Lee Neuenburg, click on the photo to do it big I wrote a brief synopsis of a similar event way back in 2008, which you can

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-11637936263373804222009-12-08T03:34:00.000-08:002009-12-08T10:41:43.574-08:00

Unless you're the sort of person who dresses up as a sea turtle to protest G20 conferences, you've probably never heard of the Chad-Cameroon oil pipeline. Under review since 1994, construction on the pipeline finally began in late 2000, financed largely by the World Bank and managed by a consortium of supermajors led by ExxonMobil. The basic concept was to connect the sludgy, low-quality oil

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-33847780556684662242009-11-30T05:27:00.000-08:002009-12-01T02:05:18.463-08:00

November 2003Dr. Gideon Gono is appointed Governor of the central Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe. It's the apogee of his meteoric rise; in fact, his first job was as a tea-boy and dishwasher at the same central bank he now controls. However, Gono has no formal training in macroeconomics, nor finance, and the post is a reward for party loyalty, not an endorsement of ability. The notoriously corrupt Gono

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-1689875147082777842009-11-25T22:11:00.000-08:002009-11-25T22:16:59.083-08:00

I've got a long post prepared, but I'm gonna sit on it until Monday, since I suspect most of my readers are on holiday. Until then, Happy Thanksgiving!

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-67035890478689380402009-11-19T06:25:00.000-08:002009-11-19T21:54:36.205-08:00

I'm riding in a bajaj, a three-wheeled jitney that's the size and shape of a roller-coaster car, and about as safe. The bajaj is a worst-of-both-worlds transportation device, combining the maneuverability and speed of a tricycle with the horsepower of a lawnmower, and is steered by a single-column handlebar that appears to have been stolen from an old SEGA Hang-On arcade cabinet. The driver

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-47912687451355710982009-11-13T05:18:00.000-08:002009-11-13T06:26:00.621-08:00

It's been a while, and I had writer's constipation, so sorry for the bloat. I'll be more concise in the future. Anyhow, I'm back.part 1: JFK to DARIt's about 17 hours from JFK to DAR, plus a two-hour layover in Dubai, but it's an effortless, timeless journey, thanks to my Emirates Airline amusement pod, which has, by my estimate, close to 22,000 hours of digital media literally at my fingertips.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-20300906895848564492009-06-29T11:54:00.000-07:002009-06-29T12:00:52.915-07:00

Flew back from Uganda to NYC via Addis Ababa and Dubai. I watched Wall-E on the flight, which, from the pampered confines of my Emirates amusement pod, made a lot of sense. I'll be traveling a lot for the next month or so, and posting will be light.But there's still a backlog of drafts that may see the light of day, and the continent is still on my mind, and I hope to return to Tanzania by

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-85851486523352915742009-06-14T22:35:00.000-07:002009-06-14T22:38:22.320-07:00

By popular request.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-83876473161239540832009-06-08T08:48:00.000-07:002009-12-13T09:22:45.971-08:00

Nampula is a smallish African town in the northern part of Mozambique, and it serves as the capital for the province of the same name. The population hovers around 300,000, but it's still the largest population center for like 1000 km in any direction. I worked there for a while last year, which is also when I wrote most of this.geographythe view from the airplane is breathtaking; a flat, green

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-57353590775724153502009-06-04T06:18:00.000-07:002009-06-04T06:35:42.359-07:00

The text is now separate from the image. Click below for a large-scale version.1. Mengistu MariamHead Dietician, Ethiopia, 1974–1991You know how, whenever anyone says "Ethiopia", your subconscious immediately presents you with this eidetic image of some starving kid, limbs all withered, belly all distended, and flies all crawling on his face? That's this guy's fault.2. Mobutu Sese SekoPresident,

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-17840135946392540572009-05-26T11:30:00.000-07:002009-05-26T12:15:36.779-07:00

Switched up and went all graphic design on you guys. Click on the picture above to see the full-size image.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-2123267387405630172009-05-19T09:07:00.000-07:002009-05-19T09:39:53.325-07:00

To be here is to have people ask you for money, and the temptation to succumb can be overwhelming. Of course, you can go through official charity channels, like an NGO or a GSE or some religious group, but then you're just wasting the money on assholes like me. The best way is to give direct, right on the street. But be careful; the more you give, the more they'll ask. Here's a guide:basic street

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-30119979226996203312009-04-30T07:49:00.000-07:002009-04-30T08:12:49.681-07:00

This was originally private correspondence. My apologies to CR.Life risks I've taken recently:Shot of Uganda Waragi "vodka": 5% chance of blindness per shot, cumulative (3 such instances; you can buy it in a plastic bag)Eating brown paper bag full of greasy pork ribs I bought on the street: 1% chance of choking, 2% chance of trichinosis per rib (7 such instances)Eating an unrefrigerated fried

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-62956950867476147952009-04-23T08:42:00.000-07:002009-06-06T06:01:44.303-07:00

The conclusion.religionchristian, but not too serious about it. there's the usual evangelical tripe on tv, but you get proselytized less than in kenya. there's also a few hindu shrines, an enormous, bizarre bahai temple (which I'm visiting on saturday), and a big, beautiful mosque atop prime real estate on the city's tallest hill. it was donated by Qadaffi: rumor has it he was sleeping with one

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-90880697831356472662009-04-20T09:32:00.000-07:002009-06-06T06:04:23.416-07:00

Part one here.environmentthe city is terrorized by a hideous vulturine menace known as the marabou stork (Leptoptilos crumeniferus). they're distinguishable by their ebon wings, their wrinkled necks, their spindly, overlong legs, and the thin wisps of beardlike hair that shoot from their ungodly beaks. these things feed mostly on trash, and since there's a lot of trash, there's a lot of storks.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-5575424064783210382009-04-16T08:29:00.000-07:002009-06-06T06:05:17.550-07:00

Kampala is the capital of Uganda, where I've been based for the last six weeks or so. I like it here.geographythe sign at the airport says "the pearl of africa", and even though I think they're talking about the country as a whole, it works for the city too. gentle hills, seven of them, like rome, with the city sprawling in between. wooded and leafy, too, with just enough air pollution to make

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-43206742027806492902009-04-09T07:37:00.000-07:002009-06-06T06:07:00.040-07:00

The Kabira Country Club in Kampala is where all the ex-pats hang out, and it represents the decadence of the neo-colonial experiment in its purest, purest form. It's got a pool, and a hair salon, and a day care, and a fancy gym with a eucalyptus-scented steam room. It has two types of tennis courts, lawn bowling, and squash courts as well. I had lunch there the other day; tomato soup with a steak

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-35326939351777345532009-03-31T13:36:00.000-07:002009-03-31T14:47:32.663-07:00

Rungwe, southwestern Tanzania, near the seldom-visited Livingstone mountains. The countryside is green and lush and it rains all the time, like Ireland with palm trees. I walk through a maze of market stalls, and there's mud on my new khaki pants. I'm searching for the music I hear, uptempo afro-jazz with loud voices and blaring horns. It's coming from an ancient two-deck tape player in a

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-78265345156601788482009-03-27T08:50:00.000-07:002009-03-27T09:02:15.261-07:00

Culinary week concludes with the best (and worst) African foodstuff.Best African Meal: Grilled Red Snapper, Ilha de MoçambiqueThe Lonely Planet website describes Ilha de Mozambique thusly: "Tiny reed houses and pastel-coloured colonial mansions rub shoulders among the palm trees on tiny Ilha de Moçambique (Mozambique Island), a former trading port and one-time capital of Portuguese East Africa.

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-16554214902556180192009-03-25T10:17:00.000-07:002009-03-25T13:27:17.148-07:00

Culinary week continues with the ten worst African foodstuffs.10. Roadside maize, rural MozambiqueI grew up eating roast corn at the Minnesota State Fair, so you can imagine how stoked I was when I saw a similar product being sold on the side of the road in Africa. But Africans, like Native Americans, call their corn "maize", and it has as much in common with the sweet corn of my youth as a

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-72817232478891613612009-03-23T04:10:00.000-07:002009-03-23T05:01:53.692-07:00

It's culinary week here at SOA! Starting off with the ten best African foodstuffs.10. Breakfast chapati, NairobiI did a lot of weeknight drinking to pass the time in lonely Nairobi, and when the alarm went off at 7:30 the next morning it would almost bring me to tears. Salvation came in the form of the chapati stand near my office, conveniently located in the stall between the bicycle mechanic

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-77237696572085607582009-03-19T09:23:00.000-07:002009-03-19T09:56:32.235-07:00

My apartment here is across the street from the UN High Commission on Refugees, and across the street from that is a ditch, and in that ditch live about 30 displaced persons, mostly kids. I'd avoided talking to them for the first couple months. Not out of fear, nor ignorance, but just following Biggie's dictum: "Never sell no crack where you rest at."But inevitably my curiosity got the upper hand

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-34314273193467576092009-03-13T07:05:00.000-07:002009-06-06T06:07:58.430-07:00

I took a tour of the Kibera slum, the largest in Africa. You're supposed to feel bad about being a poverty tourist, but fuck it, I wanted to see the place. "Kibera" means "forest" in Swahili, but that was all converted to fuel decades ago. It's desperately poor. Rivers of shit everywhere. I saw a dude eating garbage. I saw a small mountain of sardines, rotting in the open sun, swarming with flies

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-77314445515532309962009-03-10T04:07:00.000-07:002009-06-06T06:03:11.082-07:00

Nairobi is the capital of Kenya. I lived there for the last three months and hated every second of it.geographythe green city in the slums. fortressed islands of wealth and privilege in a sea of interstitial poverty. 80 percent of the population lives on 20 percent of the land, in accordance with the pareto principle. the slums are among the worst on earth. i've got a lot more to say about this,

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7756942372042454353.post-11206216522851293852008-06-30T08:31:00.000-07:002009-06-06T06:02:37.108-07:00

Maputo is the capital of Mozambique, and I wrote this about eight months ago while I was living there. It was originally posted on another blog somewhere else, but belongs here.transitthree levels here. the first is the hired driver. this is what you get if you work for the UN or an NGO. you ride around in a land rover or toyota 4x4. your driver has taken a defensive driving course and knows how

dickiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15599614085416883020noreply@blogger.com1